Hesed

There’s a Hebrew word for love that shows up on several occasions in the book of Ruth. It’s hesed. As one anonymous writer put it, “Hesed is the consistent, ever-faithful, relentless, constantly-pursuing, lavish, extravagant, unrestrained, furious love of our Father God!” I really like that definition but I think there are a couple of words missing: sacrificial, costly. Hesed sacrifices something to love someone. Hesed can be expensive, draining, risky or even emptying. Someone usually pays a price for giving hesed.

Over the years, we’ve had several friends adopt children. Some our friends adopt because they simply can’t have children biologically. God has placed a passion on their hearts to have a family and adoption seems the best course to do this. They love these little gifts God has given them with all whole hearts. Other friends have children biologically, but are still compelled to adopt. In no way do I want to minimize the sacrifice of those who have built their family through adoption, but there’s something intriguing to me about those who have already established families, and decide to open their home to more kids.

This past Sunday, I bumped into my friend Tim at church. Tim and his wife, Susan, have two biological children who are now teenagers. A couple years ago, they adopted three more kids—siblings they had taken in through foster care. It’s been intriguing for me to see this new family dynamic grow. I asked Tim how his week had gone, as I had heard that one of their adopted kids had been sick but I didn’t know the details. Tim told me Josalyn had spent eight days in the hospital with a respiratory infection. He said she was home and much better but it had been a tough week of going back and forth from the hospital, worrying about her condition while juggling all the responsibilities of everyone else. Now, just for fun, let me play the “what if” game for minute. What if I would have said to him, “Dude, you should have just dropped her off at the hospital and picked her up when she was better. You have enough responsibility with your real kids. Let the hospital take of her. Why do you have to run back and forth and worry about somebody else’s kid?” I’m betting that this would have been my last conversation with Tim; and he would have responded with some passionate words for me: “Phil, she is our real daughter! When we adopted her, we chose to love her as a full and equal member of our family. She’s our responsibility, no matter the circumstances. We love her!” Tim could have just, “We hesed her!” He would be declaring his consistent, ever-faithful, relentless, constantly-pursuing, lavish, extravagant, unrestrained, furious love that, at the time, was sacrificial and costly and started with a choice to love.

In the final part of the story of Ruth, Boaz shows a similar version of hesed as he negotiates with a family member to buy a plot of land from a widow. From a distance, this seems like a typical business transaction that could add to his estate’s value. But with the land comes the widow’s daughter-in-law, who is also a widow and is a woman born in Moab. Moab’s history with the Israelites was not good, so a man who willingly takes on a wife from Moab would be taking on social baggage. But, there’s more at risk. Boaz, in marrying Ruth the Moabite, is agreeing to father a child with her, to allow the child to take on the name of Ruth’s former husband, Elimalech, and to pass on a piece of his estate to this son so that Elimalech’s name and linage would be preserved. Not much in this deal for ol’ Boaz. There’s more risk for Boaz than potential value. Why would he do such a thing? The answer—hesed. Boaz loves. He loves Ruth, the widow foreigner from Moab. He loves Naomi, his family member who has fallen on hard times. He loves Elimalech, the dead man whose name and legacy could disappear. There’s possibly nothing much to gain for Boaz but that’s the nature of hesed. Hesed sacrifices for others.

As we approach Easter, Jesus’ action on the cross is the truest example of hesed. At the cross, he would declare his consistent, ever-faithful, relentless, constantly-pursuing, lavish, extravagant, unrestrained, furious love that was incredibly sacrificial and costly that started with a choice to love. As you approach the Holy Week, meditate on these verses:

For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. John 3.16 NLT

You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross. Philippians 2.5-8