Explosion in a Mini-van

ex·plo·sion

a. A release of mechanical, chemical, or nuclear energy in a sudden and often violent manner with the generation of high temperature and usually with the release of gases.

b. A violent bursting as a result of internal pressure.

 Everyone knows that when you mix certain ingredients together you have a high probability of causing an explosion. Gas fumes and a lit match. Mentos and Diet Coke. All you typically need is something flammable or chemically reactive, something to put it under pressure and contain it, and a detonator. But, what if you were to replace “mechanical, chemical, or nuclear energy” with “emotional energy” in the above definition? Try the following mixture!  A young dad driving in heavy traffic. Three small kids tired of being buckled in car seats. A nasty thunderstorm limiting visibility and crawling traffic. All contained in a mini-van on the verge of breaking down. All that is needed is a detonator.

This is one of those dad-stories that I look back on with a ton of regret. Our family was driving home from a trip to the U.P. on Labor Day. Labor Day is the one day of the year when people are allowed to walk the Mackinaw Bridge. Thousands of people do this each year and it causes a challenge for drivers heading south. Our 1990 Plymouth Caravan was struggling that day. Every time traffic halted to a stop, the temperature gauge would slowly rise to dangerous overheating levels. I grew increasingly worried that the van would eventually break down. All I wanted to do was get home that day and let my mechanic solve my mechanical problem. I didn’t want to be stranded on the road on a holiday with a wife and three small kids on an overfilled freeway. As long as the car was moving, it stayed cool enough. If we had to stop for a backup, I had to shut it down for a few minutes. For three hours, I nursed the car down the highway. My tension level was pretty high but I was able to keep it in check… until… the detonator arrived on the scene.

A massive thunderstorm crossed our path and for some reason, the van could not take it anymore, leaving us stalled on the side of the road. It’s amazing the little things that can detonate a verbal explosion in a man. In this instance, it was a simple question from the back of the van, “Daddy, why are we stopped?” For some reason, that small question sparked a dark explosion in me. I don’t remember the exact words I used in response but I do remember the damage I caused that day.

Being the man in the car, I tried to do the man-thing in this situation. I popped the hood, got out of the car and hovered over the engine looking for something obviously broken that I could fix with a piece of gum, a hanger, and a crayon. I was clueless. In my frustration, I did the one thing I knew I could do: I slammed the down the hood of the car with incredible force. Now soaked from rain, I got back into the car. I know everyone had questions like, “What’s wrong?” “How long are we going to sit here?” “What are we going to do?” But my first explosion had effectively shut down any inkling to ask any more questions. Then Janice, my wife, did something I thought was just out of line and inappropriate for this situation. She gently suggested that I try starting the car again. Apparently she had been praying for God’s help during all this and thought it was worth a try after her private prayer time. I wanted to snap at her and may have muttered something tasteless and lacking encouragement, but with reluctance I turned the key. The van coughed and sputtered but with a few tries it fired up again and within minutes we were back on the road.

I told you earlier that this was a story I look back on with great regret. It’s because I absolutely missed some huge opportunities to lead my family in an adventure in faith.  How much better would our day have been if I had quietly taken my worries over traffic, a mini-van, and storms to God? How much better would it have been if I had allowed my kids to join in on the adventure of seeking God’s help and protection when trouble began to brew? What would it have been like to gather as a family to ask God to intervene when we found ourselves on the side of the road? How cool would it have been to celebrate together that God is bigger than storms and junky mini-vans?

As a young man and a young dad, I came to the stark realization that I wasn’t yet mature in my faith to trust God with the explosions of life. In that season, I was unable to lead my family through a journey of faith that God had provided for me that day. Instead, I defaulted to the easy alternatives to trusting God: Worry. Anger. More worry. More anger.

I want to be a man like David, the psalmist. He learned early how to respond to the storms and breakdowns of life. I’m sure he failed from time to time but it’s clear from his songs that he strived to trust God when struggles crossed his path. As I flip through the Psalms, it’s very evident that David pursued God in all situations in life. So perhaps seeking him in trouble only came naturally. How much better is it to use these words in times of trouble?

I look up to the mountains—
does my help come from there?
My help comes from the Lord,
who made heaven and earth!

He will not let you stumble;
the one who watches over you will not slumber.
Indeed, he who watches over Israel
never slumbers or sleeps.

The Lord himself watches over you!
The Lord stands beside you as your protective shade.
The sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon at night.

The Lord keeps you from all harm
and watches over your life.
The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go,
both now and forever            

Psalms 121 NLT